Memories Of An Uneventful Afternoon

Some days you try to get along with the world, and pat yourself on the back for making an effort. On others, you try and end up judging yourself for becoming everything you ever hated. You feel like you will explode by simply being nice, by simply trying to get along, by simply trying to avoid conflict and confrontation. You breathe in, you breathe out. You make poetry with every heart beat that was a bit too loud, a bit too hollow, a bit too rebellious. You survive. One more day; for it to begin again the next.

Dress - H&M

Boots - Street Style Store

Cardigan - Street Shop

Photos c/o - @stootea

Fringed Kimono

This is the kimono I got from Dressin. I wrote about them *here*. I have fancied owning a kimono cardigan for a while. Kimonos tend to make me look bulkier. But, I decided it's high time I just got one. 

There are a lot of rules for dressing up a woman's body. The rules are more restrictive for fat bodies. The clothing, according to mainstream fashion dictats, should not be too revealing and neither should it be too misshapen/oversized. One runs the risk of exposing fat rolls with revealing clothes, and god forbid anyone sees those. The horror that would unleash, right? *yawns with sarcasm* And clothing that makes you look bulkier is also a complete no-no. Because, God forbid if we look fatter than what we already are!
So, I gave up my inhibitions and wore the kimono in all it's glory. It was too damn hot that day so I had to keep my outfit simple. But, nothing really beats the blue jeans and white tee combo. I got these round sunglasses for just a 100 INR. Well it was a gift. I am on my way to owning a collection that will soon consist of nothing but round sunglasses. 

The thing is, the grunge loving bohemian heart of mine loves unironed, oversized clothing. There is a lot of appeal in asymmetric and deconstructed clothing. These design details can make even the simplest of clothes highly interesting. Probably why I am such a fan of Yohji Yamamoto's designs.

Photos c/o - Anupriya DG

Fringe Kimono Cape - c/o Dressin
And this is the pullover I got, but the size being a bit too small I gave it away to a sister of mine - Paris Eiffel Tower Pullover

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Niine by Niine-Designer Wear For Every Body

Niine by Niine graciously invited us over to check out their latest offerings for the upcoming seasons at their store. It was a good opportunity for me to go back to the locality of my old school. It is just near where the famous Ekdalia Park Durga Puja takes place every year in autumn. So, all in all you can say this store is located right in the midst of a lot of nostalgia inducing landmarks for me. 

Sprawling over three stories Niine by Niine houses the best of both Western and Indian wear for men and women. The different labels you will find here are - in house designer Sonia Kripalani along with Seema Oberoi and Mini Singh from Delhi. The 1st floor is filled with traditional weaves like chanderi, chiffon, kalamkari, cotton jamewars, tussar and muslin. The 2nd floor is full of the prettiest gowns, bandage dresses, and a plethora of accessories discovered on travels across the world. On the 3rd floor you will find menswear for all occasions ranging from regal looking jackets, vests to bridal and other traditional garb. There is also a segment dedicated to shoes that range from the chunkiest of platforms to the most glittery heels. There are plenty of chic and trendy options here for everyone.

Things I loved about designer and proprietor Sonia Kripalani's work is the vibrant use of colour and prints. Even better is the fact that you will find something gorgeous for yourself no matter what your size is. The store is full of statement making pieces. If you love something and they don't have your size, fret not because they will customise it for you. It's not just the size that is customisable over here though. They can make something specially for you that fits your budget for your special day. We all know weddings can be darn expensive if you don't wish to compromise on your aesthetics. Niine by Niine is the store for you if you love bright, cheery colours and if you love trendy pieces that will make you stand out wherever you go. Constantly innovating and striving to provide the best of the best, Niine by Niine aims to grow by opening stores around the country & foray into standalone menswear boutiques.

FlySongbird

Stay Sassy with the Westside Sassy Soda Collection

My Durga Puja shopping is rarely complete without a customary visit to Westside. They always have something I like in a variety of sizes. I am very happy to tell you that Westside has launched the Sassy Soda collection on 29th August which caters to the style loving plussized girls. They called me over to check out the collection and I really liked the designs. It is a casual meets party wear kind of collection. They have printed pants with zippered details, jumpsuits with lace detailing, casual tees with velvet appliques, sheer blouses, tie-up tops, crochet shrugs, denim skirts and pretty dresses as well. I was told they will keep adding more things to the collection every week. I was really impressed that they have incorporated all the latest trends in this collection. The sizes range from a US 16 to 22! That's what makes it even better. Larger women often wear drab solid colours that give them no shape and make them look and (I presume) feel even worse. We all know the power of dressing nice no matter what our sizes are. It is not about dressing like you are ready to hit the party circuit. Even if you love wearing slogan T-shirts and jeans, it needs to fit you well otherwise you will feel like shit. Don't reach for sack like garments to hide your body. Sassy Soda is here to help you with that problem. They have shades from dreamy corals, reds to darker blues and blacks. It is an in-house brand and the prices are pretty reasonable. So, kudos to Westside and I wish this range keeps expanding. Check out some of the things I clicked when I visited the store.

FlySongbird

Winter Roses Jersey Dress

I have been meaning to get more maxi dresses and skirts in my wardrobe for over a couple of years. I have not been too successful because I don't like sleeveless (no, not because I have any issues with my thick arms, I am perfectly ok with every scar and bulge. If anyone has a problem looking at it they can go kill themselves. I just don't want to shave every day, sorry), cap sleeves will do too, but even that's asking for too much it seems. All the things I like are sleeveless or too expensive for daily wear. I got this one from 20Dresses thinking it would be ideal for college. But, I think I am keeping this for casual hangouts with my friends. So my hunt for cheap daily wear continues.

Jersey Dress - 20Dresses 

Wedge Boots - B.K. Market

Studded Bracelet - Romwe

Sunglasses - c/o Firmoo

FlySongbird

Sheinside - Genius!

Sheinside sent me this fun sweatshirt. Donald Duck with nerd glasses on, and the ironic "Genius" written on it just makes it more quirky. It is pretty thick and definitely not for the summer. But, the moment the temperature drops I can see myself wearing this repeatedly. I got the product within 18 days of ordering, thoroughly impressed by that. When I like something/someone, I fall hard, and I don't mind being a repeat offender. The longer things last the better, I was never into cheap thrills and flaky friends anyway.

Donald Duck Sweatshirt - c/o Sheinside (get it here, not an affiliate link)

Round Sunglasses - c/o Firmoo

Shoes - B.K. Market

Jeggings - Pantaloons(years ago)

Some times I feel stupid taking my own photos. It feels even more odd editing the photos. The urge to Photoshop a bulge here and there remains strong, but I fight it because this blog is for people to see how a non-thin body looks like. The oddity of your own body and the imperfections often stand out more when you stare at it longer. I sometimes wonder if I really look that way in real life, when I move around and breathe and talk and laugh or if it is all a trick of the light in a particular photo.When I look at other not so thin (plus-sized or not) bloggers, I identify with the bulges and not the smooth perfections. Seeing anybody wear clothes and wear it well is an inspiration in itself, but when the whole world is obsessed with becoming thinner or in having a thin waist and the "right" curves, you need to see these other bodies that exist all around. I follow a lot of body positive sites and all those women dress beautifully. There is nothing wrong with feeling and looking like a slob on some days, but, the fact that you can look good and be admired despite being bigger is a good feeling. It reminds you people are not all brainwashed, that the future may not be so bleak that people won't be able to look beyond the outer shell of a person. You don't need to dress up or put make-up on, but you totally should if you think it's fun without making excuses for it. If you are a guy and like wearing nice clothes and carrying jazzy accessories/gadgets don't bother about those who think you are odd, slap anyone who thinks it's a girly thing to do. Teach them to open their minds. There are too many people telling girls to cover up their bulges and scars, there are too many girls self-harming, trying to resemble the girl on the magazine cover or on the runway without realising the model also looks like a human being in person. That is why it is essential that there are also these other people who exist with all their glorious flaws out in the open.

FlySongbird

Links I Love

1. Do you know what psychopomps are? I tweeted today it's my word of the day. Read about 10 psychopomps from ancient mythology.
2. The world is not skinny vs fat. "Bodies Aren't Ugly. Bullying Is" campaign created by  "The Militant Baker" is a powerful photo series. Check it out here. There has been 588 submissions as I type.
3. The Outsider by Albert Camus is one of my favourite books. The Outsider (aka The Stranger) and other really short classics that you should read up without any excuses.
4. This Pantene #WhipIt campaign made by BBDO Guerrero that beautifully shows the stereotypes both men & women view each other through.
5. Did you know: the first interracial TV kiss was in 1968 between Captain Kirk and Lieutenant Uhura in Star Trek. 10 memorable and defiant firsts in TV history.
6. These women are the bomb!
7. Loving these colour photos from the First World War.
8. This tweet talking about the Indian politicians in the face of the recent LGBTQ debacle is appropriately funny.
9. If you love Bollywood and think posters are an art form then this Minimal Bollywood Posters page is for you.

Zivame - The One About How To Choose The Right Underwear

This is a post which is named like the episode titles of F.R.I.E.N.D.S. And I know for a fact that shopping for the right lingerie can be quite daunting and embarrassing, especially if you live in India where even today most lingerie shops are run by men. Even if there are women in the stores, they try to convince you that the largest size they carry would fit you if you are big breasted, and (I have heard) they keep trying to push padded stuff on those who have smaller breasts. Real incident - a friend and I went to this nice store in some mall asking for a bra that is seamless and won't show up from underneath fitted dresses. The response was that if we wear "such" dresses the underwear would show. I think we got shamed for wearing what we were by a woman who sells underwear for a living at a mall. I have had it.

 I don't usually talk about breasts publicly, but I feel every woman needs to know what is their actual size and I think I have figured it out finally after having read numerous articles telling people how to (mostly incorrectly) measure the underbust and cup areas. If you are not wearing the correct size then you might end up with some serious damage to your breast tissue, get scars from wrong underwiring and too tight straps digging into your skin and get back injuries from the strain or weird abrasions from constant friction against ill-fitting bras. And stop wearing hideous shapewear which does nothing but give you back pain, just stop!

Get it here

This is where Zivame comes in. It is high time we had a space like this.
Read it in their own words first.

"Zivame is India’s premier online lingerie store, featuring over 2000 lingerie styles to choose from: bridal lingerie, plus size lingerie, every day wear, shapewear, leisure wear, nightwear and swimwear for women. ... The brand has recently launched an exclusive Fast Fashion range that has international styling and appeal.

Zivame is the one-stop solution for every Indian woman’s lingerie needs. The brand philosophy is based on the fact that an Indian woman’s lingerie needs change with age and stage of life that the woman is in. From the teenager just beginning to use a bra, to the college girl, career woman, bride or the lady on her way to motherhood, there's something for everyone.

Customers can also easily browse by category, brand, color, size and even choose lingerie by identifying what they want to wear it under! Zivame betters the offline shopping experience of lingerie by offering consultative content for all products with aesthetic images, allowing users to understand the look and feel of a product. With the use of detailed illustrations and images, customers are provided with all the necessary details to make a purchase decision.

Zivame also offers very inexpensive fast shipping and has a customer-friendly hassle-free returns policy."

The first time I shopped from them was when I had grown tired of having limited options from actual stores. Zivame has the widest selection and they are aesthetically pleasing apart from being efficient. Surfing the site is extremely easy. If you have a budget to abide by, if you have a particular brand, size and type in mind - it is just a few clicks and then what you don't want to see is eliminated from the search page. Custom searching doesn't get better than this. Here's the thing, they have bra sizes from a 28B to a 44FF! To make sure I get the right size I ordered a relatively inexpensive bra and I was apprehensive about its quality. I was surprised at the quality, perfect fit and support when it finally arrived. I have used its measurements as a reference point for my other orders. The underwire sits perfectly on the underbust region, the centre of the bra sits fittingly between my chest and does not rise up.
They also have the most beautiful range of shapewear that will fit your purposes. I went out for lunch with a friend who was wearing a Zivame shapewear underneath a beautiful fitted long skirt, it was not uncomfortable at all and she didn't feel any discomfort while we merrily stuffed our contented tummies with biriyani and kebabs.

Here is what she had to say about her shopping experience at Zivame (being a regular customer, I felt her opinion would be of great value to you all)
~
❝I really appreciate the sizeable range of lingerie on offer and their prompt customer service.Any doubts about my proper size with respect to a particular brand have been sorted out with efficient discretion. It provides a stop-gap solution for wearing backless or slightly outre clothing with their selection of certain tailor made products. In the Indian context where such issues cannot be easily mentioned without drawing undue attention to oneself, such features of the website are particularly welcome. The "notify me when product comes back in stock" option goes a long way in alleviating any unnecessary hassle over product availability. They have recently adopted a more secure and rigorous online payment option via debit/credit card which addresses any misgivings I might have had about financial fraud. The site seems to be taking nascent steps into the market of apparel retail and i would like to see greater variety of choices in that regard, particularly in their selection of patterned stockings.
However I do believe their delivery can be a bit awry and their notifications not always in tandem with their estimated time for shipping. In cases where COD option is availed of, it can require an unnecessary wrangling with one's set schedule for the day. Maybe these are teething problems but it would be best to address them asap so that it does not become a disincentive to shop from what is otherwise a most efficiently marketed site❞

Just so you know the female to male employee ratio at Zivame is 4:1. They have a donation system where you can donate Rs.10 every time you shop, that goes on to help underprivileged children and women across India. In India millions of women are still forced to use ash, sand or rugs during menses.You can also donate your old clothes. They are associated with Goonj. Goonj helps dignify this need by providing Sanitary Pads to these women.

Here is a chart I made for you guys with some bare essentials to arm you with when you delve into the online lingerie shopping world. But, do remember to check individual product measurements before buying. You may not be the same size for every brand. Always remember your own measurements in inches/centimetres for reference.

Do let me know if you have any queries and I would love to help you out the best way I can.



I was provided with a voucher by the company but the opinions are mine.

Dream Girls - Dress Like The World Is A Better Place

Do you want to wear crop tops, stripes, polkas, peplums, hot pants, no pants, maxi skirts, sack bags and safety-pin shorts but fear you don't have that perfect apple, orange, pineapple, apricot and spinach figure to go with it? (Given the way things are going all those "body types" would be real very soon. As I type this someone out there may very well be getting paid to device body types out of more fruits and vegetables and furniture.) Fear not, because (unlike mainstream publications) I am here to give you a well researched (as in I typed in a few honky tonk words in Google and went shopping myself) view of what the style conscious plus sized woman can wear and where she can shop from. That's after all a big part of my fatshion blog. The fact that a size 12 reporter (venting at a news article in our local daily) has a hard time finding clothes which fit her well, when a size 22 with less resources looks cool in awesome clothes says something about this article in the paper. It is rather disheartening when women say they are too fat to be stylish. Personally, I have never had store helpers be rude to me for being too big, even though I did get handed a pair of pregnancy trousers in a store once. I just laughed so hard that they were embarrassed and laughed along with me. Instead of crying about, "oh it is so hard to find something for my size!" (which doctors say is a common complaint amongst women of sizes 0 to infinity) go out and list the few stores from where you do find things you love and soon there will be a list of places where everyone can shop from and hence - solution. Find a solution, do not cry about it. It's almost as if there is this whole conspiracy out there by mainstream media. They just want us to be fairer, thinner, taller and blonder.

Let's now talk about the lovely ladies I  have featured in this post today. Some of them work in the industry. Some of them have been featured/work with, you know, small odd names (*ahem sarcasm*) like Vogue, Cleo, Marie Claire, Refinery 29.
One thing they have in common - they don't dress for their bodies according to the fashion rules (and the fashion Gods have blessed them for their courage and spunk), they wear what they like and look damn good. They are changing the way fat women see themselves. They are changing the way the fashion industry wants to dress the fat women. They are from all over the world inspiring this girl sitting in a strange city dreaming of the world. A better world.

shorts, sheer, floaty awesomeness, crop top, midi skirt

gothic wintry rich shades or funky colours all over

above the knee dresses - sporty or sophisticated, with or without leggings to show off those legs!

bondage top with blazer or fishtail dress with sheer panels?

still think you need fashion advice from mainstream junkyards when you can have your own unique style?

peplums and quirky prints anyone?

glam enough or do you need more bling?

❝Friday I wore this outfit to lunch with my sister, not only were people staring tremendously, but the cashier girl smiled and said, “I have a question, Are you suppose to be Selena?” ha! I just laughed and said “No, I just like wearing this.” When the girl asked that, my sister looked at me quickly thinking I was about to spazz on her for questioning me, but honestly…you just can’t explain fashion to some people, so I didn’t even bother. It’s something I do for myself, not for others. With my amount of bluntness, I could have easily said..you see the group of guys in that corner all wearing basketball shorts and a wife beater? Nobody is paying attention to them except horny teenage girls, but I have everyone looking at me whether they’re thinking positive or negative. I’m getting a reaction out of people, others who dress mediocre with lack of self confidence aren’t.❞

-

Nadia Aboulhosn, model and blogger, Not Short Of My Identity.

 

Friday Link Love - Body Acceptance

"Wabi-sabi suggests that beauty is a dynamic event that occurs between you and something else.
Beauty can spontaneously occur at any moment
given the proper circumstances, context, or point of view.
Beauty is thus an altered state of consciousness, an extraordinary moment of poetry and grace." -

  Leonard Koren, Wabi-Sabi: For Artists, Designers, Poets & Philosophers

Okay people you know I am a big girl in a world where people generally bash on all kinds of body types, be it skinny or fat or everything in between. You all complain about your flab or untoned arms and big thighs and whatnot irrespective of what size you are. And I always tell you to love yourself regardless of what a few petty people have to point out. Self love is a right we all need to practice because we are awesome! Yes it is ok to feel crappy on certain days, we are not bright yellow daisies with sunshine shooting out of our orifices that we have to be bright and cheery everyday. Don't let any moron tell you otherwise. Don't let the moronic voice in your own head tell you otherwise. Work for the body you want to have or don't work for the body at all and love yourself regardless of it. You deserve it!

Here are a few links I came across the internet that will cheer you up.

via

❝A guy can pick you up off your feet, and it won't break his back.❞

 

❝Wearing whatever you want is a political statement. Join the revolution. Throw style rules out the window. Wear the tutu. Wear the horizontal stripes. Wear the turquoise skinny jeans. Wear the see-through blouse. Wear the bikini. Wear the sweat pants. Wear the shirt that says “Does this shirt make me look fat?”. Wear whatever it is that makes you happy. This is your life.❞

❝You are fucking beautiful. I'm saying this with a straight face and seriously meaningful look where I maintain eye contact for an uncomfortable amount of time. I know you don't feel like you fit into the category of gorgeous that our world creates. I know that its hard. I know that its a daily battle. But fuck their fascist beauty standards. The second you stop looking for a skinny model in your mirror and start looking at YOU... is the second you will start to appreciate what you are. Stop looking for flaws. Stop looking for differences. You are perfect. You are more than enough. You are the best thing that has ever happened to you. And you are fucking beautiful.❞

-

Things No One Will Tell Fat Girls... SO I WILL. 

(read her blog she is awesome! she is so going on my Inspirations Online page) 

❝Hey Mike, I know you've been flooded with mail regarding your comments on sizeism, but I wanted to take a second to write you about a project I've been working on.

..

P.S. If you would like to offer me a "substantial amount" to stop wearing your brand so my association won't "cause significant damage to your image", don't hesitate to email me. I respect you as a business man, and my agent and I would be happy to contribute in furthering your established success.

P.P.S. You should know your Large t-shirt comfortably fits a size 22. You might want to work on that.❞

 -

 To: Mike Jeffries, c/o Abercrombie & Fitch

❝Because yes, the idea that you must be a size 0 to be sexually desirable to an attractive man is hurtful and damaging. But what bothers me more is that it's just dumb and untrue. It's not that Lena Dunham is living in a fantasy world. It's that her critics won't open their eyes to this one.❞

-

I Look A Lot Like Lena Dunham; xojane.com

I do not watch "Girls". But I felt the controversy regarding this issue of how women who are not sizes 0-4 are not attractive to men who are conventionally good looking was relevant to this post. I also like what Patrick Wilson's wife Dagmara Dominczyk said about the whole issue.

Patrick Wilson’s Wife Puts The Lena Dunham Controversy To Rest

Wrapping up for now with this : Romwe Memorial Day Sale, 20%off selected items from 05/25/2013 to 05/27/2013

 Summer holidays are coming and that means beach, sunshine, barbecue and more.
Are you ready for your holiday with bikinis, sunglasses and hats?

Well get on with it! You can't be thinking of hiding inside now, can you!